Now, it’s one thing if you’re a whoremonger and make no real pretensions to be anything but. There’s even a kind of Laissez les bon temps rouler integrity to that type of rascal that we may even have to admire a little bit. He is, after all, what he appears to be. Edwin Edwards comes to mind. Remember a few years back when David Duke wrested the Republican nomination for governor of Louisiana to face Democrat Edwards in the general election? All the establishment Republicans panicked about having an actual sheet wearer as their standard-bearer, and so they all lined up behind the colorful Edwards with the slogan: “Vote for the crook. It’s important.” Now, those were the days, way back when slippery characters didn’t pretend to take God’s dictation.
Which brings us to the very special case of David Vitter, who is the worst kind of reprobate to be found in heaven, hell, or Washington. For Vitter is not at all what or who he says he is. A self-described “values conservative,” the public figure of David Vitter that we are all subjected to is a pinched, prissy man who sits in judgment of everyone and won’t shush about Jesus. Just a horrible bore who doesn’t like for sick children to have health insurance, hates family planning, is appalled by gay people and gay marriage and brown people from south of the border and the United Nations, all of which in the Vitter moral universe blur into the same thing: grave threats to the tautly ordered no-fun zone that is David Vitter’s immortal soul.
And, oh, how David Vitter does like to instruct on personal sexual conduct. “Abstinence education is a public-health strategy focused on risk avoidance ... by teaching teenagers that saving sex until marriage and remaining faithful afterwards is the best choice...” says Vitter.
Well, Aristotle and Shakespeare knew where this story was going centuries before any of us were ever born. Because of course David Vitter loves prostitutes. And of course he got caught. And yet he still wears his grotesque mask of righteousness, and Louisiana seems poised to be fooled again by the hypocrite this Election Day. Maybe they should first talk to Mrs. Vitter, who during more innocent times said of Hillary Clinton (and her husband’s manhood), “I’m a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary. If he [David] does something like that,” Wendy Vitter said, “I’m walking away with one thing, and it’s not alimony, trust me.”
See the full list here.
Esquire also ranked what it considers the “10 Best Members of Congress.” No Louisiana politicians made that list.
MAY 22 This post was written the day after the second line shooting in NOLA, by Brentin Mock. Mock is a friend of Deb "Big Red" Cotton, a blogger who was shot in the back and was seriously injured. It is a raw, emotional piece of writing, something the writer obviously felt he needed to get off his chest. But it raises questions that can't be easily dismissed, and might give some insight into where the source of these events truly is.
MAY 22 In this Baton Rouge Business Report post, Rolfe McCollister considers the privatization of bus service in Baton Rouge. After decades of under-funding, it is a mess, and although a tax (partially) passed last year, improvement hasn't happened yet. McCollister apparently feels it is time to let private business get in on the transit business.
MAY 22 This post on Bayou Buzz by Jeff Crouere urges the defeat of a bill that would grant modest pay increases over the next several years to the state's judges and clerks of court. The state is in no position to fund pay hikes, Crouere argues, with the pay increases costing a total of $9 million over several years. It sends the wrong message to the (proverbial) hard-working people of Louisiana, he says.
MAY 22 The Advocate reports here that State Treasurer John Kennedy is complaining about a meeting of the corporation that oversees the state's tobacco settlement. The Governor wanted it restructured, and he has some support, but not a lot. The corporation agreed with his plan, but Kennedy didn't, and it appears that the meeting was noticed in a manner completely different than that of all previous meetings. Kennedy's given to hyperbole, but in this case the fish don't smell too fresh.
MAY 22 In this Advocate story, Carencro Police Chief Carlos Stout says the recent federal indictment of a strip club owner is all wrong. The indictment alleges that drugs and prostitution went on with impunity because club staff made arrangements with "local" police. Stout says it never happened, and while his cops do work security in the parking lot, they're not allowed inside.
MAY 22 This amusing post in DIG Baton Rouge recounts an ad that ran on Craig's List recently; the advertiser was seeking tenants for a Beauregard Town house. He knew his market, and wrote an ad that the most ironical hipster couldn't resist. Apparently, he really did know his market, because the ad worked like a charm.
MAY 22 In this post in The Lens, Mark Moseley comments on the rhetoric Gov. Jindal employed in trying to save his tax "reform" package. One interesting point concerns Jindal's use of his brother, Nikesh, in a little story. Nikesh left Louisiana because of his inability to get a decent job, the story goes, but the story won't hold water: Nikesh lives in DC, which has an income tax level comparable to Louisiana, Moseley says. If income taxes caused the dismal situation, it should exist in DC too. Right?
MAY 22 This post by columnist John Maginnis traces the trajectory of the bill that would fund construction at community and technical colleges -- and bypass the Board of Regents and traditional higher ed funding mechanisms. Sure, it will bust the legislature's self-imposed debt limit, but some leges feel that there's more need (because there is more growth) in the community and technical college area than in the university area, he says.
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